Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Not Done Yet

All but Death, can be Adjusted --
Dynasties repaired --

Systems -- settled in their Sockets --

Citadels -- dissolved --

Wastes of Lives -- resown with Colors

By Succeeding Springs --

Death -- unto itself -- Exception --

Is exempt from Change --
- Emily Dickinson

It was one of those "where were you?" moments.
Michael Jackson's passing away is a big deal. He was like Colgate, Milo and Nokia.
A part of our lives that we thought would always be there.
When news of his death rocked the world, we were left shocked.
Even me. I'm not like, a bigcrazydiehard fan but a few of his songs are my personal favorites and the moonwalk never cease to amaze me.
This is how it feels when a legend died...empty.

A day after, my mum told me that a former schoolmate of mine died in a tragic car accident. He was only 21. My sister used to have a crush on him up for 3 years (dari darjah 4 smpai darjah 6~kids). I was best friends with his big brother. After primary school, I've never seen them again. Went to different high schools and soon they became remnants of my childhood memory. So when I saw his picture on the Sunday paper, I was struck by just how unfair and sudden death can be at times.
He was too young to die, but he was taken anyway.

Being young, apparently is not an excuse. Death doesn't judge the years of one's existence, it takes you away regardless of how Life insists that you have so much ahead of you.

God, I have so much ahead of me..
I want to graduate, take my family to Bali for vacation, watch Man Utd home games at Old Trafford, get my Masters&PhD, buy my own car/house/LV bags, get a German Shepherd, travel to Europe, wear a bikini at a beach somewhere in the States, maybe California and get a nice tan, go to concerts/Broadway..etc..etc..it goes on and on.
Oh heck, I haven't even fallen in love properly yet.

Suddenly the future feels unsure, slipping dangerously from my grasp.
How could one be so sure that they will still be here tomorrow?

Angst aside, the death of this friend is a reality sucker punch that really drives the point home.. that i just feel..so thankful to be alive. So goddamn thankful....
to just to be here, being Jess(though being me is not so awesome sometimes) and breathing..
God, I am not done yet.

*Rest in Peace*
Mitchell Evan A.(1988-2009)
Michael Joseph Jackson (1958-2009)

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

The FedEx Tribute

"I can go on with the rest of my career in peace knowing I don't have to worry about never winning Roland Garros" - Roger Federer

I've seen him crying on two occasions.
One, the heartbreaking tears at the Australian Open final.(blogged about it here)
Two, the relieved tears after winning his first French Open trophy(the pic above), thus completing a career slam.
On that Sunday night, as I watch the Greatest.Of.All.Time lifting up the Coupe des Mousquetaires , I knew that I have witnessed a moment of historic greatness. A privilege of a lifetime:)
14 Grand Slams and counting....
Congratulations Roger Federer!
Enjoy your throne in the pantheon of greats.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

June's A Pronk

"Life is full of choices, if you have the guts to go for it. That's why I get immediately bored with anyone's complaining about how boring their life is, or how bad is their town. Fucking leave and go somewhere else. Or don't."
- Oh Henry Rollins, not everyone is a rock star. I see your point but I'd rather vent.

When June descends, I know exactly what's going to hit me.
Boredom. Idleness. House chores.
July is not that far off. The craze,buzz and fuss of hectic life is looming ahead.
So there's ample time to ponder and wonder, to plan and contemplate previous and predicted failures.
Equilibrium. It's sucking me in.
It is during this period, this state of idleness that seduces the mind to think TOO far ahead,
daring one to toy with dark thoughts...stuff that miseries are made of.
I'm not the brooding type.
So it pisses me off when I'm forced to be one.

On the bright side, May was amazing.
Comrades reunited. Friendship renewed. Plenty of love, fun and laughter to be cherished.
(Every reunion is a type of heaven:D)

(1) Nina's Engagement Day

(2) High School BFF reunion:)

Oh, and this....

Another lifelong dream about to be fulfilled.
Hopefully bad luck doesn't "if-you-seek-amy" with other untimely obligations.
Now, off to deflower my FRIENDS dvd set.
Till next time peeps!