Saturday, November 6, 2010

I Remember

“It's surprising how much of memory is built around things unnoticed at the time”

I have a little space in my heart.
In it contains a lot of you.
As I walked on without turning back,
This tiny piece of memory will always be yours.
I will carry it with me..
forever :)

Sunset :)

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Trampled On

Cultural Sensitivity.
Yeah right.
Some people, like you, you and you flaunt the words around to serve your prejudices.
As if I was born yesterday.
Aif I wasn't born HERE - Sabah. Negeri Di Bawah Bayu.
So don't even dare to imply that I haven't considered all (if any) possibility of offending any types cultural sensitivity. Unless they are yours, kan?

I don't understand why some people get worked up over a dance <gulp> <gasp>. Modern dance, for instance does not, in any way, encourages osculation, fornication or wankinism or wayward thoughts. People dance for fun - activities that are enjoyable or amusing.
Not everything screams the birds and the bees okay.
Loosen up a little, will you?

Have the decency to inform me in advance before pulling the plug next time yeah?
Not after I've worked so hard (all that time and money) only for it be canceled in the eleventh hour.
Just because I'm a youngsinglenewt-----r doesn't mean I have no life nor does my forehead bears the initial L.

The hurt and embarrassment was too much.
But yeah,
Shit happens.
So tell me,
How do you initiate change,
when even baby steps get trampled on?

Saturday, October 2, 2010


Hope is the Thing with Feathers - Emily Dickinson

"Hope" is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all,
And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.
I've heard it in the chillest land
And on the strangest sea,
Yet never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me. 
For a split second, I dared to hope. 
A brief, happy summary of what could be
But in the end, reality prevails.
You will always be the one who got away.
As I will be too.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

The Way I Am

I have always stand alone.
Chasing dreams, painting stars.
I have always stand alone.
Cutting through the darkness,sewing on patches.
I have always stand alone.
And I like it.

Do you get it now?

Friday, August 27, 2010


A leaf fluttered in through the window this morning, as if supported by the rays of the sun, a bird settled on the fire escape, joy in the task of coffee, joy accompanied me as I walked.

After a month here in Pitas, I could look you in the eye and say, "I'm fine here" with so much honesty that it could make you cry at how much this whiny person has changed. After much soul-searching (for the lack of better term), I am so thankful to God for this opportunity to live my dream. Though it might not be a bed of roses with very few good days in between, I believe in good karma.

I have 25 teaching hours per week. Five classes (Form 1, Form 2 and Form 4). I've expressed my interest in teaching Form 4 and I got it, but Form 1 and 2? 

Fortunately, I was proven wrong. Dead wrong

After a week teaching them, I realized that teaching the lower secondary students has its own charm. Kids have little inhibitions, eager for attention and they generally rock your life by making your lesson plans come true. Ask them to act, sing, dance, and mime, etc they will do it...just as long they like you.

My Form 4 kids have so much potential, but with years of very minimum exposure to English, they need to work harder than most people.Can you imagine not knowing what a blog is in this digital age?
It's devastating! 
Gandhi once said, be the change you want to see in the world.
Baby steps, Jess.

Wow, I'm actually talking about serious stuff!
Teacher-talk suits me just fine, yeah?

All is fine and acceptable for now. 
My first salary which is around 3kplus is still untouched. (WIN!)
Not much but it's 100% mine :) All mine!
Twirl now,
Because we have a lot to spin and skip about.

Monday, August 9, 2010

How You Remind Me

Sometimes, (especially in the past two weeks) I forgot WHY I'm here. Too busy being a whiny baby.
Sometimes, I need to remind myself WHY I'm here.
And guess what?
The reminder came to me.

It's like, the big guy up there is trying to tell me:
"Stop moping" 
Remember how and why you came to be here.

p/s yang ini kira lucu juga la. Ada dua budak Form 3 came to see me during recess. 
"Cigu, ni present untuk cigu". 
"Aikk, cigu pernah masuk kelas kamu ka?"
"Tida pernah"
"Jadi kenapa kamu bagi cigu hadiah?"
"Sebab kami mau rapat-rapat sama cigu"


Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Darlin' it ain't that easy


I am officially a teacher now.

A working woman.

A freakin’ adult!

Yeah, I don’t feel like celebrating…yet.

I’ve been posted to a secondary school in the rural district of Pitas. The first thing that came to mind was FMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFMLFML

The recurring theme of my first week here was MOPING. Even though the school turns out to be nice, the PK1 extremely helpful, the Kerani is super efficient, the teachers are friendly BUT somehow, I don’t feel settled. I don’t know what to expect other than the worst. I miss my family, my friends, and my dog. Well, starting over is a pain in the ass. You know what I mean.

My second week started on a good note. I finally got my table in the Teachers Room. The teachers I’m staying with are awesome housemates; they didn’t mind that I couldn’t cook. I hang out with two other new teachers at school – Tim and Diah. I think we are going to be good friends for a long time :) Have I mentioned that clean water is like GOLD here? Even the school buys water for daily use. At one point, I’m gonna have to start buying water WHEN the huge well that they pumped water from runs out of uh, water (wow, that’s a lot of ‘water’ in one sentence) No, I haven’t seen the well and yes, we use water pumps here.

However, the one thing I can’t stand is the unstable internet connection. There is no 3G coverage in this area; even Broadband of any kind is snail-slow. The school wireless connection is my only hope of going online but even that only works well for a few hours before the usual “Server Not Found" crap. Oh, the fact that electricity goes out every few hours for at least ten minutes EVERY DAY is not helping.

So, I’m getting Streamyx in two weeks. With internet, anything else is bearable.

The irony of the situation is that I have waited and expected this (to be sent to an interior school) but apparently experiencing it is a whole different matter. Adjusting takes time right? Besides, I’m here for a reason. It is time to put the six years of higher education to use and produce my first batch of students.

That thought alone is enough to get me through every day. (memotivasikan diri..hehe)

So bring on the little monsters already.

p/s I’m pretty sure Taylor (my dog) is missing me right now.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Holiest Thing Alive

Sometimes, it's embarrassing how much my Ma is still the same overprotective nag like she was when I was 12. 

Ten years ago: "Makan sayur banyak-banyak supaya kurang sikit jerawat ko"
Now: "Itulah ko tidak makan sayur. Tingu kulit ko banyak scar."

Ten years ago: "Ko sudah minum susu ka?" She forced Nespray on me
Now: "Ko sudah minum susu ka?" She forced Alpha Lipid on me.

Ten years ago: "Jangan lupa botol air ko atas meja" 
So I'm forgetful.
Now: "Mama suda kasi sedia botol air ko. Jangan lupa lagi macam kemarin" 
I was in my final year in college and I still forget my "botol air". Old habits die hard.

Ten years ago: It's always fried rice and hot milo for breakfast. It always took her ten minutes to wake me up for school.
Now: Toast bread and hot nescafe for breakfast. She knocks on my door "E-C,  pukul 5.30 sudah ni, bangun!"

She never let me, nor my little sister out of sight when we were little. I had to sulk for two days before she finally relented and let me go to my first camping trip. I don't have to ask for permission now but she still calls when I'm out - "mau hujan lebat ni" which is mum-speak for "be home early".

There was one time when I went to a friend's house to watch Titanic. It was 1998, I was 12 and Leonardo Di Caprio was a revelation. I didn't tell her because the friend's house is 2km away. She wouldn't allow me to walk on my own, you know, because bad guys are everywhere. That's what she told me every day. I decided that Titanic would be worth braving the threat of bad guys and..uh head hunters. She flipped out when she got home from school and I wasn't there. 

Later that night..... 
Relax ma, I said, I only went to a friend's house.
Ya, but I didn't know where you were and I was worried sick.Don't ever do that again..yada yada yada...

Last year, I went on a trip to Penang. By bus. From Shah Alam. It was a wonderful trip. On the journey back to Shah Alam from Penang, it was near midnight and we are still on the road. She called every hour, asking where I was, how much longer until we reach Shah Alam. I got annoyed. Ma, no need to freak out. The bus driver is driving slowly. It was near 3am when I got home at Shah Alam, Now I can sleep, she said. 
My dad called later in the afternoon, telling me that mum didn't sleep well last night worrying about me.  
Just, be careful ok, don't worry us so much, he said.  
Will do, pa.

I am 23 now. Mum still cooks me breakfast. Forces me to eat veg. Calls me when I'm out, reminding me to be safe. Get on my case if I skip breakfast or shop too much. Nag me to sort out the ever expanding stuff in my room, tell me to keep my long hair or tone down the junk food. 

Between 1998 and 2010, a lot of things happened. The highlight? - I grew up. But for some strange reason, Mum never got that memo. To her, I'll always be that little girl that cuddles up to her at night.

So I get it you know, I'll always be her little girl. Age is just a number anyway.
And I wouldn't it have it any other way.


 I love you :)

Friday, July 2, 2010

All Things TV

Here's a quick recap of what you can expect from some of my your favorite TV series when they return a few months from now.

1. Gossip Girl : The case of love interest.

i. As we all know, Chuck Bass was shot in the season three finale. Fret not, he's alive and a "changed" man after his close encounter with death. He will have a new girlfriend, name unknown, and they will bump into Blair and Serena in Paris. Clemence Poesy (pic below), who was in one of the Harry Potter movies, will play Chuck's new girlfriend. 

ii. Lover boy Nate who has slept with every girl on the Upper East Side will also have a new love interest. Katie Cassidy (pic below. wow, she's so Serena!) of Melrose Place fame, had been casted to play this role. I wonder where the writers are going with this. Nate haven't had his own storyline since Season Two. Well, a storyline that doesn't involve falling in love with a new girl and getting effed up by the girl in the end. Boring! and Chace can't really act. Sorry.

Season Four of Gossip Girl will return on September 13th.

2. Glee : The dentist and Charice

i. Emma told Will that she's dating her dentist in the season 1 finale. Lo and behold, John Stamos will be playing the dentist! I bet the character is a douche. Looking at his picture did nothing to lessen that suspicion..

ii. The super talented Charice Pempengco has joined the Glee cast for season 2 as a recurring character. Playing an international transfer student, Charice, whose character's name is yet to be released, will be Rachel's new rival, maybe something like the Rachel-April rivalry in the first half of season 1? Since Charice is just as good as Rachel, vocal-wise, how about personality-wise? We'll just have to wait and see. 

iii. Another yeay? There will be a Brittany-centric episode in the new season. This is by far, the best.move.ever by the writers! 

My favorite Brittany line: "Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?"

Season 2 of Glee will return in September. Premiere date has not been specified yet.

3. House - Huddy and a new doctor

House and Cuddy will 'engage in a meaningful relationship". I've been waiting for Huddy to happen since three seasons ago. The writer sure made us wait! Furthermore, expect Dr. Cameron to make few appearance, Thirteen won'be around and a new female doctor will join the team. Awesome~

Here's the Season 7 premiere picture released by CW. Huddy on vacation! 

Season 7 of House will return in September. Premiere date has not been specified yet.

4. Supernatural - Reunited
The gist of the new season as released by the CW:

Season six will be a season of mystery and shadow... monsters, angels and demons roam across a lawless and chaotic landscape. And so Dean Winchester, who has retired from hunting and sworn never to return, finds himself being pulled back into his old life — pulled back by none other than Sam Winchester, who has escaped from Hell.

The two reunite to beat back the rising tide of creatures and demon-spawn, but they quickly realize that neither are who they used to be, their relationship isn’t what it used to be, and that nothing is what it seems.

In case you missed it, Castiel and Bobby will return as..Castiel and Bobby. Apparently both are alive! Excited yet? Emmm, i'm more on the curious side.
My favorite picture of Sam and Dean from Season 1. No, they are not boyfriends on the show, they are brothers! ~roll eyes~

The sexy Winchesters will return for Season Six on September 24th.
These updates are legit and confirmed as of 1st of July 2010 as released on TV FANATIC and several other official sites of the aforementioned shows :)

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The Naked Truth: 2 - Cooking Woes

Dear Diary, 

I am domestically challenged. I mean , I'm great at keeping the house clean and the garden pretty but do you want to know which part of the house that I dreaded the most? - no, it's not the attic. It's the kitchen! Before hitting puberty, I have no doubt that KITCHEN is synonymous to EATING. You go in there for breakfast, lunch, tea, dinner and supper, heck yes, life is good.

That was until I was told that girls should know how to cook. Just like how they should wear skirts, have long hair and smell nice. I never take cooking seriously during my high school years, mostly because my mum cooked all the time, just enough for a family of four. I did, however, acquired the skill to cook fried rice without using onions. Because I hate onions..then. 
I'm partial to it now.

So, my lack of cooking skills or talent never bothered me. I'm not a choosy person, I eat whatever is on the table. Except veggies of course with exceptions to few types of vegetable. Certainly no leafy greens because I have sensitive gag-reflex. I do make a mean spaghetti once in a while. I've improved a lot since my first attempt two years ago. Other than that, I really don't know how to cook.

When I was sharing a house with five other girls in Shah Alam, all of them are cooking monsters! I realized just how behind I am in the cooking department. I didn't know how to prepare 'Ayam Masak Merah" or the "Sayur Kailan dish" or any type of soup for that matter! I usually play Assistant Chef, because I'm THAT bad.

Bad, like how bad. you ask? I have no idea how long to wait until you throw in the veg or chicken or whatever in the pan. How much salt? Chicken cubes? How are they suppose to look like when they are thoroughly cooked? (for fried chicken/fish). So I know what celery is, but what is it for? Now that I do know what the celery is for, another question follows like, how do I prepare it? or what type of dish that should have celery in it?

This girl is a TOTAL FAILURE! I bet that's what you're thinking now. Yes, this is for real, you better believe it. Ask Dedz if you want further clarification. Cooking is my ultimate Kryptonite. I'm graduating with ANC in November but I can't cook if my life depends on it. That's a serious crime to womanity! ~gasp!~

This is my fault obviously. I haven't been paying attention to Mum all this while and I haven't really initiated anything. I can't learn how to cook IF I don't want to cook in the first place. It's really time to get greasy in the kitchen. Take-outs and eating out is fine when you are single, but once married, you don't want to feed your guy with McD all the time, especially when the said guy have a cooking maestro for a mother. Not that I'm getting married or cooking for anyone other than the family anytime soon..heh!

Don't worry future husband, I am learning now. Slowly. I'm not as ignorant as I was two years ago. In fact, I'm getting better. I made my first chicken soup yesterday. My sister said "ok bah". I trusted her judgement because she is a fickle bitch when it comes to food. A better cook than me too! Now, there are mum and dad to impress. Urghhh, daunting!

So, I'm actively googling simple recipes online. Mum is busy with school so she can't really give me a one-on-one tutoring. It's okay, Youtube takes care of that. See if I transformed into Rachael Ray 2.0 in a year's time. 

Or maybe I should just marry a chef.

Friday, June 25, 2010



First of all, there are a few things that you should understand
I've never been ashamed to admit that I'm a TWILIGHTER. Yes, I'm a fan but don't expect me to buy a twilight mug, key chain or stickers because my obsession has its limit.
Yes, I have read the books. Yes, I've seen Twilight The Movie and New Moon The Movie, only liking the former because the latter bored me to tears. Or maybe it's because the novel itself is mostly about Jacob, and I don't give a rat's ass about Jacob. 
No matter how pretty Taylor Lautner is.

Speaking of Taylor Lautner and Jacob, I'm a certified Team Edward. I've never defected, not even when they made Edward look like a starving boho in New Moon The Movie and have a half-naked Jacob prancing around in every damn scene. 
But I would like to remind you though, being a Team Edward doesn't mean I'm team Rob Pattinson. I love Rob when and because he plays Edward Cullen. Of course Rob-when-he's-not-Edward is not that bad at all, mainly because he's dating Kristen Stewart aka Bella....

who just happens to be my favorite Red Carpet Muse. I've been following her red carpet style since Twilight and her choice of LBDs, gowns and shoes is always on the mark. I won't discuss her acting style or talent but she plays Bella perfectly, which is why I don't get why people mocked her Bella as being  "too awkward"  when Bella Swan is suppose to be AWKWARD. I know right, duh?!

Anyway, I managed to catch the Eclipse Premiere in L.A early this morning via the live streaming on E!Online. I wanted to see what Kristen would wear. Well, it wasn't exactly love at first sight. My first thought was 

The back view is stunning:

but the front view? The one-sided long-sleeve leaves me cold and speechless.

but Kristen still looks AMAZING! if you can ignore the long-sleeve though -__-'
Click here to gawk at some of her best Red Carpet looks:

Oh, if you happen to be a Robsten shipper, here's a little something for you. 

The Robsten Bubble Of Love

Please don't flame me for the above comment about not being Team Rob Pattinson. He's a pretty attractive guy.
 What, you want more? Okay, here's another one.

The infamous grip of love

just one more to conclude the post:

So listen up Malaysians, Sabahans and Kota Kinabalu-ians
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse premieres on the 8th of July 2010. 
If you hate Twilight and think it's ridiculouslamegayboring or whatever.,
you have got to be at least curious
you wouldn't be reading this.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Green Glam And Gorgeous

What do I think of Beauty Pageants? = 
Pretty girls parading pretty dresses. Wow, look at her crown! ~gasp~! She won? ~gasp!~ Oh my, I love her hair!

Obviously the first thing that we look for when assessing Beauty Pageant contestants is the marks of a beauty like blinding smile? check! eyes like the sun? check! Tall? check!
If all above checks out, the second round of assessment ensues. A bit difficult this one, maybe that's why most people never bothered to look further than the first round because really, how do you judge or measure intangible qualities such as personality, confidence level and brains?
Obviously when on stage, everyone brings their A-game, so the only way to know for sure is to mingle with the potential Queens in a casual setting and prepared to be awed or vice-versa.

So, the opportunity of a lifetime presented itself in the form of an exclusive invite to the Miss Earth Sabah Dinner, thanks to Mr. Dinoza Mahruf and my BFF, Dedz who thought that it would be awesome to have some life outside of the Induction Course that nearly killed us all. We managed to convince Elvie aka The Twin to join and that's how the three of us ended up sitting at a table at The Roof Restaurant on the 15th June 2010, feeling all giggly and stupidly awkward! haha
We found out later that instead of just taking photos with the Miss Earth Sabah finalists, we were also given the privilege to interview them. Now that's a surprise bonus!
Though i only managed to talk to four finalists (May, Fiona, Lydia and Melody) it's enough to conclude several FAQ about BP that have been hovering in my head all this while. 

The first one that i talked to was May Salitah, a sweet soul who is bent on promoting tree-planting culture to the masses, especially to young children. Anyone who have met and talked to her will agree with me on this - that she's a friendly, confident and articulate lady who seems to be genuinely passionate with her cause. 
So, it's not really a surprise when she was crowned as the 2010 Miss Earth Sabah on the 20th June:)

Picture credit to Miss Earth Sabah Official Page

The second finalist, Fiona is also as passionate as May when it comes to promoting environmental causes in which her main concern is to work on eradicating the rubbish-throwing culture of the city people. I mentally applauded this because let's face it, though a city, Kota Kinabalu has yet to embrace the "Bersih Tanpa Sampah" mentality. Meanwhile, Lydia, a licensed diver and a graduate in the field of Environmental Science expressed her interest in preserving the cleanliness of the coastal area.
 Think of Tanjung Aru and you get the idea.
 I was also really impressed with Melody who feels that change should begin from the individual. Walk the talk and the rest will naturally follow. It's akin to the butterfly effect, very  inspiring! :)

I came to the conclusion that Sabahans can be rest assured that our Miss Earth Sabah winners truly, wholly embrace the concept of "Beauty With Brains" or in the context of Miss Earth pageant 
"Natural beauty - Unblemished, immaculate and refreshingly natural".

Congratulations to the winners!

Picture credit to Miss Earth Sabah Official Page

Make us proud  at the Miss Earth Malaysia Finals!

My post has gotten ridiculously long but it wouldn't be appropriate to end it without mentioning our meeting with Miss Earth Malaysia 2009, Mandy Nandu, an amazing, down-to-earth lady and again to Mr. Dinoza Mahruf, whose effort of promoting this event by reaching out to the Sabahan Bloggers deserves another round of applause from us who were lucky enough to be there ^_^. Honto ni arigato! 

Picture credit to Miss Earth Sabah Official Page

As for you, yes you! and of course, me too!
Play your part. 
Heed the call
Protect our Mother Earth.

Till the next post, 
xoxo :)

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Spoil You

Being a proud Gleek, I'm really satisfied with the season finale. Of course New Directions didn't win Regionals, Vocal Adrenaline was far more superior with their mash-up performance. What I didn't expect was them (New Directions) not getting a place at all, and their crestfallen expressions was really painful to watch. ~sob~

Other things did fall into the right places. Quinn and Puck's baby girl end up in the arms of Shelby, who is going to be an amazing mum, if her i-want-a-daughter speech is anything to go by. Finn and Rachel - finally getting together. Will and Emma - possibly getting together next season but not without complications. Emma's dentist, the one she's seeing after breaking up with Will,  will make an appearance in Season 2. We've got a love triangle people!

As for Kurt and Mercedes, they will be getting new love interests next season. Now that will be fun to watch! My ultimate wish is for Mike aka The Other Asian to have more speaking lines. Be involved more in the main storyline. Hook him up with Brittany, whatever, just don't waste his potential! Other than that, I love how the writers humanizes Sue, despite her crazy bitch antics. She's capable of compassion and empathy to a certain degree (yeay!)
I love how she stood up to Olivia's scathing comments on the New Directions kids. Olivia branded them as talentless with 'illusions of grandeur' ouch!)
"But they are just kids"
Sue is right. They are just kids doing something that they love with gusto. You don't shoot them down by criticizing them with venom, constructive feedback is always the way to go.

As for the best performance by New Directions this season? I'll have to go with the Regionals performance. That's a perfect 10 for vocals and heart.
Oh tizzles, I'm going to miss Glee! Do come soon Season 2 :)

As for real life, I got an A for my AE aka thesis. To be honest, I think I would die if I get less than an A. Read this, it's a tribute to my depression in the course of completing AE..haha. The thing is,  I have put everything that I've got into it (kunun-kunun la) that it would be a crime to not expect a good grade :)
When I saw this on my final examination result slip:
I know I made it :)

p/s Please excuse the hints of self-congratulatory. I'm so happy beyond words now. Please take note that this is not a daily occurrence, both in this blog and real life :)

Wednesday, June 2, 2010


This is a story of about a girl and a series of unfortunate events involving a piece of clothing called the g-string or least known as thong, often confused with sandals by some people. 

The first incident took place at her college dorm. Or more precisely, the toilet. The girl recently came into the possession of a cute GS with diamond straps. Fake diamonds AS the straps and not ON the straps. So what happen was, after shopping at the mall the entire day and stubbornly ignoring toilet calling due to her determination to crash every outlet with a SALE sign, her bladder finally rebelled just as she got out of her car at the hostel parking lot. So she ran for her life, I mean, the toilet. She gets there in time, pulled down her jeans in haste and then SNAP! SNAP! SNAP! she watched in horror as the diamond know..snapped. It's a good thing that she was wearing jeans.

The second one is quite crazy. You know when you gather your laundry and one or two or more piece of clothing might slip through your hands. Yeah, that happens when you don't use the laundry basket. Her little cousins were playing nearby with the family dog..who happens to love chewing things. Among the piece of clothing that miraculously slipped through her jelly fingers was a GS, her sister's shorts and her cousin's pink pajama. The family dog wasted no time appreciating his new playthings. The girl and her little cousins wrestledjumpedroared to save each piece and when they finally did, the girl's youngest cousin, a 7 year-old boy holds up the GS and said, "alaaaa, ini santut tinggal tali-tali lagi"....
when the said 'santut' is perfectly intact. 
There are other incidents. Minor ones though. Which she refused to share.
he he

Life's like that :)

Wednesday, May 26, 2010


@_@ cuteness overload :)

Justin Bieber. I get why people like him. In the 90's, the 15-year-old me would have gone crazy over him. I grew up in the boy band era, so that saaaaays a lot about my acceptance of the growing force that is Bieber. The song "Baby" is not so bad, it's the perfect song to listen to when you are bathing your dog (or is it just me?). The other song "One Time" used to be my breakfast song. You know, the one you sing along to while having your caffeine fix?. Indah got me addicted to the other song, the duet with Sean Kingston. Yesterday, that song was on repeat the entire time while doing laundry. Damn, that scared me for a second. 
Oh did I just spelled 'Bieber' right? 
~panic~ panic~!

Fortunately, one thing I've learned throughout the years, just enjoy feel-good music when you hear one. Bieber might be a kid, overplayed, overrated, whiny voice, stupid hair and bla bla bla but if his sugar pop song makes your day a bit better why not just..feel? 
Life's too short to take a pop song seriously.

Above all, I still prefer my Ingrid, Robin, Buble, Leona and Jason, thank you very much.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Naughty Bites

CHAIR. Anyone who reads my blog, my tweets and my Facebook status probably knows that I'm an avid Gossip Girl fan. I blogged about the Season Two Finale in which Chuck finally confessed his undying love for one Blair Waldorf. In this Season Finale, Chuck and Blair holds the spotlight again with one BIG question mark : "Will Blair meets Chuck at the top of the Empire State Building?

My guess? YES. But Blair won't make it on time. She will probably have a last minute epiphany and runs off to the building only to find Chuck gone. Hey, it's 7.01pm! "My heart is closed for you forever" - sounds lame but when Chuck said it, it's perfect. I love Chair but there's no way a second happy ending is lined up for them.
But I am happy to be proved wrong. PLEASE!

GLEE. When did Rachel get so annoying? I liked her in the first half of the season and then she just got...annoying! But I love her voice, except that weird tortured expression she get going on when she sings. My current favorites are Brittany and Santana - especially Brittany. Girl is just so clueless!!!! hahahaha! Emma is adorable and Sue, oh SUE! My favorite TV bitch. Nothing brings it like Sue.

TAN. I've got a tan, doesn't look good on me. The sight of my own skin peeling off is tragic.

STOLEN. Someone stole my favorite vintage blouse from the hostel laundry room. I hope you trip and fall and break your nose! 

SECOND. My Red Devils ended up second in the EPL. Don't fuckin' gloat in the comments or I might cyber-bitchslap you. ha ha

CONFIDENCE. My life will never be the same when this week ends. I've always wondered about the extent of my confidence when it comes to things that are not...well, my thing. But one thing for sure, I will NOT let myself down. I'm going to do this for me, and whatever the outcome is, I will make sure that I have ABSOLUTELY nothing to regret. Amen. 

DRAMA QUEEN. I got voted as the Drama Queen at the recent B.ED TESL Cohort 3 Farewell Dinner. Not because I am one in real life, just that I used to act on stage. I miss those drama days :)

Well, that's it for now....waitt there's one more. I got my first blog award from Dedz and Manda! 
Will blog about it later.
Till the next post, tata!

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Over and Out.

candy roses unicorns and babyblues!
B.Ed TESL is over and done with.
Well, unofficially lah.
But still, 
Reaching the finishing line after what feels to be forever and never-ending,
is really, truly fulfilling.
This calls for a...

Saturday, April 17, 2010


Hope deceives more men than cunning does.

I want something I probably will not get.
Not because I don't deserve it.
Because for some reason,
When I want something so bad (this bad),
Circumstances always find a way to mess it up.
I've got no lucky stars to save me,
A lost cause.

I'm tired of being disappointed
All the mocking whys and hows
I'm tired of healing
The gaping hole always takes forever to mend.

Hope is a dirty word.
Even faith is a nasty accomplice.

Do you think,
If I try not to want it so much
Heaven or whatever will let me have it?
Because if it doesn't,
I think I die a little each time....

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Wake Up And Smell The Coffee

“In the name of the best within you, do not sacrifice this world to those who are its worst. 

In the name of the values that keep you alive, do not let your vision of man be distorted by the ugly, the cowardly, the mindless in those who have never achieved his title. 

Do not lose your knowledge that man's proper estate is an upright posture, an intransigent mind and a step that travels unlimited roads. 

Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. 

Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach.

Check your road and the nature of your battle. 
The world you desired can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, 
It's yours.”

Tuesday, March 30, 2010


My muse: Megan Fox:


Thursday, March 25, 2010

Shine On

This is my life, summarized in one single illustration.

As of today, March 25 2010. 11.24 am, I have about a month and half left to my final semester :)
Time does fly.

Yesterday, March 24 2010, as the clock strikes 12, hello world, I'm a 23-year-old. It was a memorable birthday because it was also the day I turned in the first completed draft of my research paper (the thing that I've given my everything to, in fact it's the most important thing in my life right now) after weeks of dodging my supervisor. The only tragedy of the day is the fact that my parents actually forgot my birthday. It's okay, they will make it up to me..he he he.

I realized that people have started asking me "bila ko mau kawin?", especially at weddings. 
Me getting married is not happening anytime soon.
Hence the matchmaking attempts.
Someday, when I'm ready, on my own terms, I will.
Relax will you?

Since this is a belated birthday post, perhaps some reflection of the years gone by should be included. Well:
Despite the crazy workload,
Despite the non-existent social life,
Despite the nonboyfriendness,
Despite some shitty incidents,

I'm a better, stronger, hotter, and happier person that all of the past Jessicas combined.
Happy Birthday Jess ;)
You frickin' pwned life.